Sometimes we aren’t able to achieve something for no obvious reason. Often in such situations we may even have strong motivation/desire to achieve that something. We may even have huge advantages over others who can easily achieve what we desperately want, but still cannot. From our perspective we are doing everything that we can and either some “coincidences” hold us back or we simply don’t feel good enough for the desired achievement.
At first sight realizing that we have everything we need to achieve the goal may seem like a painful experience (creating a feeling of injustice – feeling that there is something unknown and unfair that holds us back and makes us helpless). Actually it can be a no-good experience, until we become aware that we are (actually were) held back only by our behavior/dynamics/inner state. At this moment we should feel a relieving “Oh! This is nuts!” type of feeling. I think this feeling is the turning point when we accept and start to respect our potential (our advantages), and accept and start to face the true cause of our inability to achieve the desired. At the very moment when we realize/feel this our feelings and mindset shift from “I am doomed, but doing everything right” to “I was trying this so weird”. Basically this is the moment when we start believing (and realizing) that we can achieve our goal, but simply have to heal our dynamics/improve our behavior. I assume that if we have a clear vision of what should be changed in our behavior then our dynamics is already in healing state and we can consciously do the behavioral change. If we feel (some) inner resistance to the change inner work (e.g. Family Constellation or Holodynamics) to resolve root cause of our problem is needed.